by Gregory Cramond
Insights into Trials from the mind of a Trials Tragic

Latest Issue.
Lunatic Fringe

The studier agrees with the collector on the subject of collectable reed valves, and fervently believes they should have their own section in the Smithsonian.

At trial in the Top end
Surely, the Top End with its exotic wildlife and stunning scenery has ample attractions to other slightly wayward trials riders. Where else in the world could you doubleblip over a 4 meter crocodile and splat up the side of water buffalo?

Big Day Out
My new bike, resting now in the shed was clean, freshly oiled, fuelled and with tyres set to optimum pressure.

Debilitating disease
The recent success of Toni Bou in recent world championship has seen a sharp rise in the incidence of DM and has become a major concern to psychiatrists specialising in trials related mental disorders.

Dirt Analysis
Growing up on a farm and studying at an Agricultural College, I thought I knew all there was to know about dirt. Several years ago I took up trials and soon found that my dirt knowledge was sorely lacking. I needed some more tutorials at Traction College.

Blokes and their gadgets. We acquire gadgets regardless of the hobby or pastime concerned.

Set on a creek flat in some woolly looking hills in East Gippsland, a large camping area cum pits is full to overflowing with tents, swags, camper vans and trailers, all fighting for space amongst a whirlwind of children, parked bikes and numerous cow pats.

In the world of trials there is an undercurrent of social elitism in what should be an otherwise classless society. You would think that rolling up to a trial each rider would view another’s bike as an equal, but no, there is definitely a high degree of snobbery happening.

Hopping Mad
One of the great spectacles in trials is the skill and poise shown by riders who can hop their bikes into position, then pause, before charging up some monster step or massive log.

Inevitably you will face plant into the dust right in the section with the most spectators. This is a right of passage in the trials world.

Let Pain be your Teacher
Today I write on a subject where my depth of experience has me as something of a world authority. I speak, of course, of crashes. A scrape, dump, bang-up, bingle, prangs or whatever you call them; a trial is full of them.

Logs, the bane of my existence…Well, at least in a trials section.

Lunatic Fringe
The studier agrees with the collector on the subject of collectable reed valves, and fervently believes they should have their own section in the Smithsonian.

Maintenance 101
A modern trials bike is a wonder of refinement, honed by generations of engineers and matured by all-knowing mechanics since the day the internal combustion motor first combusted.

How, I say, can you approach a trials section without factoring little mathematics equations in your head?

New Baby Blues
The arrival of a new bike (some would say a new family member) in the shed leaves the proud parent on the horns of a dilemma.

The task of observing is a thankless one and there is much to learn for the novice observer. Riders without exception will try to pull the wool over an observer’s eyes. To get savvier an observer needs street smarts.

Did you ever have one of those days where you should’ve stayed in bed?

Rock Spotting
It happens to all trials riders. You graduate from doing slow tight turns around a garden stake in the driveway and now you’re looking for a new challenge.

Section 4, Day 2, 2007 Oz Titles
Seeing a camera dangling from my neck a little bird told me that Section Four might be worth staking out as it was the most significant obstacle facing the expert riders on this day.

Summertime Blues
January is a time where all trials riders are walking around the house twisting their wrists and manipulating invisible clutch and brake levers with their itchy fingers.

My dreamy thoughts drifted to as they always do to matters of trials and those beads of moisture had me pondering just what it is about trials that make riders sweat so much.

Tales of the Seatless
I’ve been in this trials caper for five years or so and if I had a dollar for every time someone has asked what has happened to the seat? Well, you know, I’d be in gravy.

I have always thought that tropical islands and trials don’t mix; too flat and sandy, coconut logs are all the same diameter, etc.

The Seven Deadly Sins of Trials
In our dear sport of trials there’s more than a little sinning going on and I have decided to root it out. Restraint and control is required.

The Venerable TY
In thousands of suburban garages across the country there are TY’s or bits of TY’s. Occasionally there are shrines to the TY, with a lovingly and painstakingly restored bike not to be ridden, of course, but only to be fired up on special occasions like Christmas morning or at a daughter’s wedding.

Trials Tots
You see them at every trial. That is, a doting Dad chasing a tot on a minibike through every section.